What Does an Agent Really Want in a Query Letter?

I’d always thought I’d know a little about writing queries for my novel, since I’ve had some success sending out cover letters with short stories.

What was I thinking?

I visited websites with advice and rules from agents on writing this difficult life-changing little letter. Seriously, I got dizzy. I suddenly realized that I didn’t know anything. Worse, a year ago I attended a workshop on writing queries, and I still don’t feel any smarter (and yet it was an excellent investment and excellent class.).

Where to send that chunk of me that is my novel. Hmmm. With short stories, I start by researching the publishers.

1. Read their guidelines.

2. Look at titles they’ve published.

3. Get to know their tastes and something about their dislikes.

Some helpful websites are pretty blunt on what agents or publishers like and don’t like, not only mentioning genres, but also writing styles. That’s very helpful. But not all of them say what they want to see in a query other than the basics––the word count, something about the plot and characters, and a line or two about you.

Ok, so now you know everything about writing a query for your novel, right? Wrong.

Different agents offer different rules on querying your novel, such as ALWAYS put the word count in your opening paragraph, along with your title. And ALWAYS put your word count in your closing paragraph, along with your request for them to review your manuscript.

So are you clear on what to do now?

Me neither.

Often, their guidelines will specify a one or two-page query. If not, you can bet whoever’s going to read your query has a whole slew of them to breeze through, and they’ll roll their eyes if they see a lot of dense writing on two or three pages.

But if they see a nice compact little query that won’t take but a minute to read, they might give you that minute. Make it count. Naturally, the best way to make yours count is to first study some exceptional queries. Yes, back to that again. Search the web and find all kinds of contradicting advice, and then take some aspirin.

A strong hook in the first line is a given. Who would read line two if line one practically put the reader to sleep? But then what?

Then take your 60,000 to 90,000-word novel and sum it up in about 150-200 words.

“Say what?” you ask.

Yeah. Talk about learning to tighten your narrative. Maybe we should all practice writing query letters to learn about writing tight, then apply what we learn to our novels.

Those little 150 or so words in the middle paragraph should sum up your novel’s plot. You can’t really afford more words if you want to have room left for your bio, which should be very short. Still, you might need 40 words for a bio.

Now you’ve got your intro (the opening hook), the novel’s title and the word count, and a brief bio. So yes, keep that plot summation short but full. Detailed and interesting. But keep it short. This paragraph needs to sell your novel. But keep it short. This paragraph has to pull a lot of weight. But keep it short.

In your bio, restrain from arrogance, no listing of three pages of boring credits nobody is going to read. Mention only a few things about you and or your published work. If you have some writing credits, mention them. If you don’t, perhaps you belong to a critique group that you can mention. Maybe you’ve participated in it for more than three months. Five years? Good. Let the agent know. Or perhaps you are a member of specific writers’ organizations like SCBWI. Mention that. Also, list a few conferences you’ve attended.

Then there’s the little one or two-line paragraph that says your novel is ready for their review, along with a request to send them a copy. It goes something like this: Idiot Learning to Write a Query Letter is complete at 50,000 words and ready for your review. May I send you the manuscript? (Don’t include the word count if you’ve stated it in your opening paragraph.)

This request is supposed to be your last paragraph, though I’ve also read that your bio is the last paragraph. But to me it seems disjointed to put this request for representation after your bio. It seems as though it should go in the last paragraph of the part talking about your novel, not about you. So I’m not exactly sure which goes in the “last” paragraph, the bio or the request. If any of you find out, please drop me a line.

Maybe I misunderstood, and what they mean is the last paragraph before the bio.

To help or confuse you further, I want to share some specific do’s and don’ts I picked up through researching what agents want in a query letter.

A. They all seem to agree that without a strong opening hook, welcome to the slush pile.

B. One agent suggested you try opening with a question.

C. Absolutely never, ever open your query with a question. (Another agent.)

D. In your plot summary section, only tell about the plot. Do not talk about theme or what the character struggles over internally. Plot only!

E. Along with mentioning your main plot points and characters (and goals, obstacles and challenges all in those 150 words), tell something about the overall theme of the novel. Give an idea of the character’s inner self.

F. Some want the word count right in the opening paragraph and some want it in the ending paragraph (So, is that with the bio? I’m joking.).

G. Some mentioned to put the title in all caps, not in italics. The reason for this was explained. Submissions are emailed, and sometimes italics come through garbled in email (or something like that).

H. Also, consider the names of the main characters, protagonist, antagonist and other main characters. Some agents want these names in all caps in your query. Others will tell you they don’t want the characters names in all caps, because it’s distracting to the eye. (Keep in mind, this would be the case on a SHORT one-page query, because you would have the title in all caps, and then anywhere from three to five names in all caps, all one or two short little paragraphs. That’s a lot of caps.

So what’s the best advice I can give you––write a dozen different query letters and hold a contest for agents to vote on the best one. If only we could, right?

Here’s my real advice. If you are querying an agent, do a lot of research. I repeat, a lot. The agents you choose might have very specific details on their websites as far as what they expect in a query. Opening with a question or not. All caps on character names or not. Three paragraphs or four. Then be sure to research each specific agent even more. Some might have a guest article on someone else’s blog, and that article might give one detail that wasn’t mentioned on the agent’s own page. It’s worth a shot. And then write that query specific to that agent’s rules for queries, following all the sentences starting with NEVER and ALWAYS.

Afterward, write a whole new query following different rules to fit the next agent on your list.

Also, I haven’t found anyone who said don’t do this, but I did see a few articles mention that it doesn’t hurt to have a sentence that shows you did your research. Mention something from one of their articles or their website that you enjoyed or that you thought resonated with something in your novel. But be specific about it. Don’t just say that I read your website, and I think my novel is a good fit. What exactly did they say on the website that makes you think your novel would be a good fit? That’s what you need to mention.

Keep in mind, I’m not insulting any agent for giving any specific advice, even though it contradicts another agent’s advice. Each agent is giving advice he or she wants followed in the queries to him or her, not everyone else. Why would they care what you send anyone else? What I’m trying to show you is that you cannot take the advice from one agent and apply it to queries to all of them.

Here are my absolutes for querying agents. You will note that I never mentioned the obvious––NEVER send a query in a specific genre to an agent who doesn’t represent that genre. Again, do your research.

That’s the only “NEVER” I’m going to give you. Well, besides the other one––NEVER assume you can write one query and change the agent’s name and address and be done.

ALWAYS open with a strong hook.

ALWAYS do your research. Yes, this is worth repeating over and over and over again.

And that’s it. You are ready to write your twelve different queries for twelve different agents, right?

Happy writing!

A FLASHY TACO CHRISTMAS DINNER!

This recipe is actually for one of my three daughters, and I'm sure they'll all know which one it is. It's for the daughter who for a brief moment was in a state of panic, thinking that due to unfortunate circumstances, Christmas dinner might be moved to her house. Her dad was the one to make the call. Though I couldn't hear her, I almost wet my pants, laughing at the thought of her expression. I could almost hear her – Me? Make Christmas dinner? But I can't cook!

I couldn't count the giggles I let out on that one.

All she would've needed to make would be the main entrées – the turkey, ham (or both), and the mashed potatoes, because that's all that's expected of the host. The rest of the family members always divvy up the side dishes and breads and goodies and bring those to the table. Nobody wants the hassle of keeping mashed potatoes fresh and warm during a one-hour drive, so the host always makes them.

But this particular daughter wouldn't know what to do with the turkey, and she'd be calling me – Do I have to peel the potatoes before I mash them?

It worked out that we didn't need to move Christmas dinner to her house after all, and I'm sure she sighed a thousand breaths of relief. But for any of you who get in a panic over Christmas dinner, here's the easiest last-minute one you can make. It will also work for you, daughter, if ever again there's the possibility of having Christmas dinner at your house. Although a few adults might quirk an eyebrow, the kids will love you for it. Who wants that boring stuffing and cranberry sauce with those awful red berries anyway?

Make a Christmas tree taco dinner.

First, you will need two-thirds of a yard of nice green fabric (honey, that's 24 inches, so don't buy a whole bolt.) Green construction paper would work as well, but you might need to tape about four sheets together to make it large enough. If you don't like that idea, and you have no fabric, use aluminum foil over cardboard and you will have a silver tree. Fold your 24 inches of fabric (or substitute) in half. Then cut the shape of Christmas tree branches out on the unfolded side. You did this in kindergarten, so I know you can do it. Unfold the fabric, and then you will have the shape of a very nice Christmas tree.

It is your choice if you want to put on any garland or not. You can string anything that you would put in a taco bar. Green olives, diced tomato, diced onion. You can make an all olive garland, or one that is all tomatoes, or one that alternates every other color.

You want nice big bulbs for the taco-bar tree, so for that you will use aluminum foil and cut a number of 8-inch circles, easily done by using a small dinner plate as a pattern. Then bring up the edge all around each circle, so that you are shaping them into a nice round bowl. These little bowls will be filled with diced onion, grated cheese, green olives, black olives, diced tomatoes, taco sauce (double your bowl for sauce so it doesn't leak), and anything else you'd like for tacos. Be sure to fill a few of the bowls with taco meat. Last, make a trunk-sized dish in more of a square shape and fill it with the taco meat. That will be the trunk of your tree.

Your dad and I would both love a meal like this, because quite frankly, by the time we're done having Thanksgiving with all of you, and Thanksgiving with a few other people, we are a bit tired of ham and turkey and all of that hoopla anyway. To look at the same meal again for Christmas is a bit of a bah-humbug, if you ask me.

Love, Mom

P.S. Merry Christmas!

 

 

MY NEW BFF--Teddy!

I remember thinking that once the last kid moved out, my house wouldn't be scattered with toys. Boy, was I wrong.

HAPPY NOVEMBER, AND LET'S EAT!

November is here, and her chilled breath already waits outside our door. November in Minnesota sometimes brings shoveling from early snows, bulky coats and boots, and temporary goodbyes to bicycles and full blooming gardens. But November also brings families together as they huddle around the Thanksgiving table and swap holiday gift ideas for the coming month. Old recipes are pulled out, phones are ringing, and plans are made. I'll take the snow any day when it also brings such warm gatherings.

November also offers an added bonus –– the smile it puts on my husband's face because he's surrounded by snacks and food and grandchildren.

What does November mean to you? Do you have a favorite recipe you'd like to share that finds your table every November? Send it to me and I'll post it with your name on my blog.

Happy days to all of you!

We Lost a Few, But Gained a Good One

This past year has brought a lot of sadness. Too many funerals and too many sorrows. The most recent sorrow came with the passing of Jada, who'd been our furry companion for almost fourteen years. 

That dog had such a personality. She was a mixed breed, part American Eskimo and part Pomeranian/Terrier. She loved to sit by my feet during the day as I worked at my desk, she was a wonderful listener when I needed to read something aloud (a thing writers and editors have to do from time to time), and she loved to play ball whenever I was willing. My husband always found time. He'd run around the yard with her for a short while every night. 

Jada's favorite trick, one that took notice throughout the neighborhood among many children and adults, was her jumping skills. When my husband squirted the hose to shoot water high into the air, Jada (up until two years ago) could jump a good twelve feet to catch a drip or two in her mouth. She had everyone laughing.

But the last couple of months of her life, she was pretty slow at play time. In fact, most often, she would just go get the ball thrown for her and then sit there to rest for a while.

There was no doubt her days were numbered, but I didn't want to face it.

But we don't always get what we want. 

For two weeks I moped around the house. Can you believe how hard it was to get involved in my writing when no one was at my feet? I'm amazed at what a habit that had become. After she was gone, it just felt wrong in my office. Something was missing, and though I tried to tell myself I could still work, I couldn't get myself to actually do it.

But last week I gave in and decided that if I was going to be me at all again, I needed a furry friend. Hence, Teddy has entered our family.

                                               

He's delightful. He let us know his first night here that he does not sleep at the foot of the bed. He sleeps right between me and my husband.

Have a great day, and if you are writing, painting, sewing, or tapping at a calculator, enjoy it. We never know how many we get. :-)

Deb

The State vs. Debi O’Neille, Case 55-cr-13-6514

Debi sat in the witness stand, her long hair in a neat fold on the back of her head. She wondered if she could avoid perjury by creatively answering the gray-haired, arrogant, no-necked prosecuting attorney’s questions.

“Didn’t you, in fact, use the word “looked” in your first chapter a total of three times, and similarly, the word “glanced” twice?”

Jerk. Of course he’d ask questions designed specifically for yes or no answers—only an idiot would misunderstand.

Idiot speaking here –“I always restrict those verbs to situations where absolutely necessary, but I didn’t count how many instances were necessary in this particular chapter.”

“Yes or no?” the attorney asked.

Geez, could they cut down on the furniture oil in this place? The lemon smell was nauseating. Debi clasped her hands tighter together in her lap, as if that would help her nerves. At least she wasn’t shaking. Not on the outside, anyway.

“I don’t recall the exact number of times,” she said. “Overused verbs can usually be avoided, because—”

In a half-turn toward the jury, the prosecutor said, “Ms O’Neille, a yes or no, please.”

“You don’t need to tell readers that a character is looking at something—”

“Your Honor, ple-e-ease,” the prosecutor said to the judge, who expelled a long sigh.

“Not when you're in that character’s point of view,” Debi continued, “and you describe the something being looked at.”

She had him there. He seemed a bit confused. He rubbed a finger over his brow. Oh how she wanted to smile.

“So by your own admission, it’s likely you didn’t need to use either looked or glanced in your writing, and yet you did; isn’t that true?”

Well holy cookies and ice cream—of course I did. Who doesn’t? “Again, sir, I don’t recall.” Oops. That might be a little white one. She didn’t remember how many times she’d used either word, but she did believe she’d used them. At least once. Or more.

“Ms O’Neille, would you like me to repeat the question?”

Which was …? “I’m sure I would have used them a time or two, but there are situations where it isn’t ridiculous for them to be included in a great sentence. For instance—”

“That will be all,” the attorney said, his shark gaze right on her. “No further questions.”

The heat of seven hells washed through Debi, a mixture of anger, frustration, and humiliation. Anger because she hated being cut off, as if what she had to say didn’t matter. Probably a lot of ex-husbands in the world had become exes for that very tactic. The frustration stemmed because she had a good answer, right on the tip of her tongue, and though no one was waiting for it, she wanted to let it out. The humiliation sprang from the collision of anger and frustration, which no doubt showed in bright flaming color on her face. She worked her hands in her lap. Would it be legal to ask to be excused?

She was saved from further worry when her own attorney addressed her. “Ms O’Neille, you looked like you had something to say at the end of that … battering interrogation.”

“Objection,” the prosecutor shouted.

The long-faced judge looked at the defense attorney. “Mr. Diehl, please rephrase your statement, and perhaps you could ask a question.”

“Yes, Your Honor.” He smiled then trained his dark eyes on her. “Would you please share what you had been about to say?”

“I was simply going to explain that there are times when looked and glanced aren’t errors in understanding how point of view works, so it’s only natural they’d show up in anyone’s writing, including mine. For instance, when the narration directs the reader to watch a character who is not the point-of-view character, but a secondary character who is glancing or looking about, then we can use those words. We wouldn’t be in that character’s point of view, and the point-of-view character would certainly notice and report if the other person looked in a certain direction or gazed at anything specific. The point-of-view character would describe that little action of the other character turning his attention to this or that, whatever the case may be.”

“So, to simplify, you’re saying that using looked and glanced in your work might have been a deliberate decision?”

“Exactly. You just can’t use them too close together in a paragraph or per page, or they’ll echo. You’ll see that when you read this transcript.” She nodded toward the court reporter.

The defense attorney smiled at the judge. “I have no more questions, Your Honor.”

When Debi stepped down from the witness stand, with all the smug arrogance of a true writer, she walked with an air of royalty, chin up and eyes welcoming to the many smiles she expected to see. “Case closed,” she said to no one in particular. “And so, I rest my case on the case of looked and glanced.”

My A to Z non-theme reveal

Last year I truly enjoyed participating in the A-Z Blog Hop. It was my first year, and though I did get a tad overwhelmed toward the end of April, I was amazed at the massive number of connections made through this blog-a-thon. I met a lot of friends, and I’ve enjoyed chatting with them since.

This year I will be attending a writers’ conference in April, and I’ve also taken on a couple of big projects, so I won’t be joining the hop. It just wouldn’t work out with me being gone for an entire week through the month. I considered writing my posts in advance and scheduling them automatically, but I know I wouldn’t be able to check my blog and respond to comments and return visits to others. I suspect you all would forgive me, but I still can’t get myself to do that. The week of the conference is going to be busy, busy, busy, and I don’t want to complicate it with guilt.

Regardless, I will still be posting and visiting many of your blogs during the weeks that I’m not separated from my computer. I’m looking forward to reading as many A-Z posts as I can, and I wish you all luck in getting through the coming month with success.

Happy writing!