Anyone who has ever had
a story or article critiqued by me knows that I slash through echoes like weeds
in Eden. Repeated words, for the most part, create a distracting noise in a
reader’s head, like a song that goes on one note too long, ruining the
otherwise beautiful rhythm. I don’t like echoes.
Unless they are
purposeful and wise.
So when is that?
Anytime someone asks me
this question, my first thought for an example usually is John Milton’s works –
PARADISE LOST, PARADISE REGAINED, ON
EDUCATION, among others. Back in college, woefully accepted by most
students, the professor assigned the reading and analytical studying of
Milton’s prose and essays. Personally, I was in awe at his work. Through careful
observation—in hopes of getting an A—I noted that he used a lot of repetition
in his work, but he used it in a specific way.
For instance the word light, symbolic not only in a religious
sense, but also in meaning knowledge, appeared in more than one sentence in a single
paragraph. Synonyms were used too, but he did not shy away from pulling out the
exact same word he’d already used. Why did he do this?
I can’t be sure, but I
can explain the effect it had on my reading. As I read a second, third, or even
later sentence, I realized it couldn’t be done (reading further) without your
brain retracing what was already said, a little echo reminding you of what had
been read in the first sentence. Not in a way of beating you over the head with
an idea, but in a way where each new sentence reinforced a previous notion or
image, while at the same time introducing some new element toward a larger
idea, or going deeper into the concept of the idea. Reading his work was like
watching a drip land in a puddle, and then watching each ripple as it expands.
Now for those of you
reluctant to go back and read something centuries old, here’s a newer
masterpiece that also uses repetition in a wonderful way: THIRTEEN REASONS WHY by Jay Asher, published in 2007 by Razorbill,
a young adult imprint of Penguin.
Does it echo? Yes, in
the most satisfying rippling effect an author or reader could want. (No noise,
just beautiful music that’s as enlightening as it is enticing.) It brings to
mind the idea that you cannot go forward, without also bringing with you a
little of the past. For instance, when you consider an education, your
knowledge (everything you’ve learned in the past), has an effect on how you
interpret what you are learning today.
So to bring this idea
to your writing with intentional repetition brings a deeper meaning that
readers may not recognize right off, but it will tease their subconscious into another
level of understanding. At least, I think it will.
Asher shows an
effective use of repetition on Page 178: (Note, the italics indicate a
different character speaking—Hannah.)
(Clay, the narrator.) “…
But the headlights don’t gradually fade away, which they should if he kept backing
up or turned away. Instead, they just stop.
As if turned off.
(Hannah’s voice.) Looking back, I stopped writing in my
notebook when I stopped wanting to know myself anymore.
(Clay) Is he out there,
sitting in his car, waiting? Why?
(Hannah) If you hear a song that makes you cry and you
don’t want to cry anymore, you don’t listen to that song anymore.
But
you can’t get away from yourself. You can’t decide not to see yourself anymore.
You can’t decide to turn off the noise in your head.
Notice the repetition
of the words turned—used with away and with off—away, stop, and back. In addition to repeating exact
words, ideas are reemphasized, such as turned
off and stopped. So, when you
read a third or fourth sentence, it echoes with the previous sentence. Then it
ripples and when you read forward again, you are bringing a little of the past
with you.
Considering the fact
that this novel is based on the thirteen reasons a young girl committed
suicide, and the narrator’s struggle to face and accept it, and then move
forward, the repetition is very powerful. Naturally, there will be no movement
forward for the narrator or the reader in a novel like this without bringing
some of the past along. Asher’s writing style, then, parallels his theme.
We
see this technique used again on page 250:
“I want to look back.
To look over my shoulder and see the Stop sign with huge reflective letters,
pleading with Hannah. Stop!
But I keep facing
forward, refusing to see it as more than it is. It’s a sign. A stop sign on a
street corner. Nothing more.”
Here the author comes
right out and gives us the word forward,
“facing forward” and follows it with the word refusing, which is a type of not moving forward. He parallels that,
reinforcing it, with stopping. So we
see this back and forth motion, two steps forward, and one step back, and then
forward again, symbolically laying out how a person moves through life.
If you haven’t read the
book, I highly recommend it.
Now for your own
studies, look at the story, “As I Walk Out One Evening,” written by HC Hsu and
published by the online literary journal, TOASTED
CHEESE. Study the repetition and analyze the purpose for it. Notice how
repeated words don’t read like a distracting echo, but a way of somehow
restating a truth, further clarifying an idea, giving it a ripple.
In your own writing, if
you are not sure whether using the same word again will distract the reader
like a screaming echo, or if it will be read as an intelligent choice in going
forward, then backward and forward again, don’t use it. Don’t use it until you
are confident that repeating a specific word in close proximity to a previous
instance of the word, is exactly what you should do.
In the meantime, you
can always find a similar word which can do the same work; and sometimes that’s
what you want. Something to bring a previous notion forward again, but not as
strongly as when you use the exact word a second or third time.
Before you begin, you
might be wondering how you can know if a specific word was repeated
intentionally, or if it was an oversight the editor missed.
1. If
you consider the numerous echoes in the short section of Asher’s book quoted
above, you can safely assume no editor would miss that many repetitions. Yes,
most novels get published with a typo or two, but it’s always obvious that they
are simply that, typos. Even then, it’s unlikely you’d find this many in a
short space.
2. Elsewhere,
the book is not littered with needless and annoying echoes. So, the logical
conclusion is the repetition was planted specifically for a specific reason. It
is your job, as the reader, to let that reason resonate in your mind.
3. When
the effect is astounding rather than annoying. My tongue didn’t trip when I
read Asher’s paragraphs.
Happy reading and writing!
Thanks for this, Deb. Very thoughtful article, and very helpful. I agree, don't use an echo unless absolutely sure it does what you so aptly describe as "going forward, then backward then forward again." Very much enjoyed your example here. Moving, yet refusing to move, and letting that repetition, that non-echo, work its magic for the reader.
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